Friday, July 31, 2009
I met with my husband this morning about our finances. I didn't really see the point of the meeting because we have the same expenses we have and we have already cut them down as much as can be cut. But he apparently wanted to ask me about a divorce so we talked about that too.
He told me that he wanted me to be able to stay with the kids but I'd have to get a job. He also told me he'd give me so much per month until the divorce went through but then a judge would just go off a matrix to determine my support payments and I wouldn't get very much money. Again, all stuff I know.
I get exhausted by discussing the same things over and over again. Just talk, make a decision and move on.
He keeps asking me the same questions over and over.
Once again the kids take the brunt of his bad decisions. They always take it. He and his family can talk 'til the cows come home about all their BS AA rhetoric about making amends and doing the next right thing. By their actions, they don't give a damn about these kids.
He also talked about my secret online life. I reminded him that I had used a pen name to protect his and his dad's anonymity. He told me I could use my real name. I guess his and his family's actions are not embarrassing to them.
Tuition for my sons school is due Monday. (At least the first payment.) We shall see what happens. I don't have high hopes for anything anymore. I asked my son this morning, theoretically, how he would feel about going to the Muslim School instead and he teared up. Very depressing to see that but that has always been my back up plan. He needs the small school environment and I know they would watch him carefully. I want him to stay in the same school once he starts. And I don't know where we will end up living. So whatever happens now I'm at peace with it. I have done my part and it's in God's hands now.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. --Jeremiah 29:11