Exhausted

Caring for my grandmother has been exhausting, but fulfilling work. I am very grateful for the time that we have had. Someone remarked to me at church today that I am such an amazing granddaughter, then she paused and said, I suppose there is a reason for that. I smiled and told her yes, my grandma had been the most amazing grandma in the world.

Things are going relatively well, but my husband has started up on things again. I asked him yesterday how many times he wanted to keep going over all of this.

It seems like he is constantly going over the same things over and over. And he just still doesn't seem to get it.

I want this time with my grandma. He is offended that I am not coming to him for emotional support. He has been making a lot of insinuations that I must be getting my needs met elsewhere.

It is always about him. He even manages to twist this into him being the victim.

All I want him to do is to keep his promises and obligations to this family. I know better than to look to him for emotional support. I am pretty clear at this point in my life exactly who I can count on that from, and who is incapable of giving it.

He has started blaming me for the divorce and is trying to make me feel bad for wanting this. He thinks staying together would be "better for our children." I told him, he was entitled to his opinion, but I don't share it. He continued to argue with me about it and I told him I was done talking about it. We will never come to terms on this.

For someone who keeps saying he is so concerned for me right now, I don't know why he continually has to bring up all this old garbage. In my mind, it was processed and decided a long time ago. I am doing my best not to blame him or hold on to resentment. But these silly arguments make that continually difficult.