Reconsidering everything....

The second thing that came out of that lunch is something that has been evolving in me for a long time.

As women, we grow up hearing a lot of advertisements about makeup, skin care and "beauty". The assumption is that if we spend all this time and money to look a certain way, our lives will be wonderful. All of this amounts to so much wasted time and resources, and our lives are no better for it.

I don't want to play the game anymore.

Most of these products are pumped with chemicals and toxins. In fact, if you wear heavy makeup, especially from a young age, it will actually make you look older.

The incidence of skin cancer is through the roof. And I believe a lot of this is not from the sun, but the products we use on our skin - including most sun screen.

There are products without all this crap in them, and I am learning more about them. I mix my own oils, made with completely natural organic oils. This is a very inexpensive way to moisturize your skin. And it works beautifully.

I don't want to even spend the time dying my hair anymore. What is wrong with gray hair? Nothing! Is it worth seeping toxins into my skull?

I have a friend who is just a few years older than me and she does not dye her hair. She has similar gray proportions to what I imagine I have. She assumed she was older than me when I met, but I did not think that. I thought her hair looked lovely and she inspired me to stop dying mine.

My mother has a glorious gray main. For years she spent tons of time and money trying to get it dyed a certain color. It never held the color right and detracted from her beauty. I feel she looks lovely than ever now.

I think one of the biggest reasons that women spend so much time and money on these products is that we somehow feel we are in competition with each other. We are not. We need to spend more time supporting and loving each other. When more of us stop playing this ridiculous game, more women will find the courage to live their lives as they are.

Men do not spend the same time and energy on their appearance. No one thinks they need to. What makes us innately wrong the way we are?

I have never worn a lot of makeup, but lately I wear less and less. As I told my friends the other day, everything is on the table now. I am reconsidering all of it.

I want to spend my life in creative endeavors, doing things that support me and my children. Anything that does not support that dream is off the table.