Lessons Learned

I found this excerpt in a magazine and I really identified with the article. It's about a Bernie Madoff victim who lost everything. She wrote a book called The Bag Lady Papers. Here are her lessons learned.

If your worst fears happen, you will live through them. They can be as bad as you imagined them, but somehow you manage.

You will surprise yourself by how well you cope. You have enormous resources you don't know about.

You are in control until you have no mind left.

When you're flooded with anxiety or panic, think; don't feel.

There is such a word as no. Use it to protect yourself.

Indulge your crazy ideas. Just think about the consequences first.

You don't have to love your parents. Honor and respect the institution of parenthood and you will feel no guilt.

There is no thing as human worthlessness. Even Madoff must have some redeeming quality, although I admit I doubt it.

People will always surprise you - with their generosity or their nastiness.

You're sunk if you lose your sense of humor.

Ask for what you want even if you don't think you'll get it. You'll be surprised at the response 60 percent of the time.

It's okay to feel pity for yourself - for a while.

Ranting out loud can make you feel quite a bit better.

Stop negative thinking any way you can. It takes discipline, but you can do it.

Fear has two faces: the good side motivates you' the bad side paralyzes you.

When you have your first sip of coffee in the morning, stop for a full ten seconds and taste how good it is.

Decide on a short-term goal and a long-term goal, and give them your very best shot.

Don't beat yourself up about a decision: it was right at the time you made it.

If you can't make a decision, you can always decide not to decide.

You have a self. Know its strengths and weaknesses.

Fear can make you tougher and stronger.

Evil exists.

Expect the unexpected, but there is no way to prepare for it.

Change is inevitable, but it's an adventure.

Loss happens. Get used to it.

Be a fighter. Life's no fun if you're not one.

- Alexandra Penney