Saturday, August 15, 2009
We are ALL whores
One thing I have been thinking about a lot lately is the idea of all of us women being "whores".
And I HATE that word.
I think it is BS connotation. I think that some women do what they have to do and then they are "blessed" with that wonderful label. And it does not seem to matter at what age we take on that role or for what reason, we are still whores. And NO ONE should endure that.
No one. And I mean NO ONE chooses to be a WHORE.
There are some powerful examples. Slumdog Millionaire is one. Brilliant film. Or the wonderful book, Blindness, which was also recently made into a movie. (But not nearly as as good.)
But I read a lot and I have seen a lot. And I can say, with confidence, that no woman truly chooses that.
Women, for the most part, on a world-wide scheme, are given their roles.
And this is sad, but true.
But more disturbing to me, in the Western World at least, that when women do not fit into the "roles" they are supposed to play, they become "whores".
And I just think that is shitty.
First of all, I would like to see any man who is quick to put this label on any women, live in the circumstances that promote this position. I would just love to see that. Because any man would kill himself before he had to exploit his sex to provide for his family. Yet, I have yet to see a woman who would not do ANYTHING to take care of her kids, or her family. And if that includes whoring herself out, I do not know any woman who would not do that, when it came down to it.
So why is the word WHORE or SLUT used like it is an insult?
Because in my mind, that sort of sacrifice should not be downgraded. It should be respected.
Because if you are going to make that sort of sacrifice to save your family, at the very least , they should kiss your ass. But it does not happen that way. Instead, the woman makes the sacrifice, feeds the family, and gets called horrible names.
I had a long talk with my sister over the course of the last two days. And many things have come out of it.
But one thing that was pressing for me, is that my sister said, "I thought J was always OK with who you are as a sexual person?"
And I thought he was too. We had discussed that at length over the years. The virtues of a man who did not judge you or perceive you as a slut because you have had multiple partners or because you like sex. And that was all good for a while.
But as soon as things started to go awry, I was suddenly a slut, a whore, and all the other names that go along with that.
And I think it is such a double standard.
Men are never penalized for liking sex. Or having multiple lovers.
But if you are a woman. You can either LIE, or be a whore. And lets be clear about this. Unless you have only had one lover your entire life, for the most part, you can still be called a whore.
And is that really fair?
So I think, that perhaps, we should all start being honest with our sexuality, and be willing to accept the labels that come with it, realizing that with our honesty, we will start our own revolution in exterminating the degrading position that millions of women are put into around the world.