Friday, December 18, 2009

Circles of Pissyness

Now my husband is in a pissy mood. If I had to bet, I am guessing he is back to reading the blog again (which he continually promises he will not do!).

He makes little comments, vaguely referring to my posts. He is obviously upset and I told him this morning that if he has something to say, he should just come out with it instead of being passive-aggressive about it.

I don't know how to amend this. The blog is a good outlet for me. I am still angry that he snooped around and found it, and I am angry that he continues to break his promises not to read it.

I liken it to him following me to my Al-Anon meeting and hiding in the back where no one can see him. He has no right to be there, and he should not be angry for my anger at situations that he has created. I have a right to voice my feelings without facing repercussions from him.

My husband and I seem to do this little dance we do with each other, and neither of us seems to stay happy with anything for very long. It reminds me of the ending of Sula:

It was a fine cry—loud and long—but it had no bottom and it had no top, just circles and circles of sorrow. –Toni Morrison, Sula

2 comments:

  1. Maybe make the blog more anonymous. Move it to Typepad and don't identify yourself. Just a thought.

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  2. Thanks Syd - not sure what Typepad is but I'm using a pen name so I really don't think someone is likely to find me on the Internet.

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