Bankruptcy

I went in to sign my bankruptcy papers this morning. It was very difficult for me. I did not want to get out of bed this morning.

I told my ex that his dad was a cheap mother fucker and I hoped his money flames the fires of hell when he gets there.

It makes me sick that he and his family could pay off this debt, but they won't. For Republicans, they are always there with their hands out - sending their son to the State Mental hospital, asking for money to help pay for rehab, shirking this debt...

All of them make me sick. My ex hates it when I compare him to his father or his family, but they are all the same to me. In fact, he is becoming more and more like his father.

I woke up with a terrible stabbing pain in my back. I'm not sure what I did - my chiropractor thinks I slipped off my pillow or something. After I signed, they worked on me for about an hour - and I have to go back for more.

I seem to take my angst out on my body. I felt strangely calm while I was there. I know a lot of people are thinking of and praying for me. This is never a choice I would have made. I keep remembering my ex saying, "$100,000 just isn't that much money to me..."

The amount of debt to be discharged is $169,000. A hell of a lot of money to anyone sane.

My ex tried to make it out all positive like I will be starting over. I told him it didn't seem that way when this will be on my record for 10 years.

I am really sickened by his lack of responsibility in all of this. The lesson I learned is I will never entrust my finances to someone else. I knew he was being reckless. I just didn't think it was up to me because he was bringing in so much money. Legally though, that money was half mine - and the debt is too. I am leaving this marriage much worse than I came in, and that really stinks. But at least I am out.