A “moral inventory"

"When addicts reach step Four of the Program, they’re instructed to make a “moral inventory”; in Step Nine, they are to make amends to those they’ve harmed. Obviously, it’s positive for any of us to soul-search, acknowledge faults and work to remedy them, and strive to repair damaged relationships. However, these actions aren’t requisites for a person to get and stay sober. A step that requires a form of atonement implies that addiction is a sin and injects morality into treatment." ~David Sheff, Clean: Overcoming Addiction and Ending America’s Greatest Tragedy

This passage was particularly tough for me to read.  As I mentioned in a previous post, I think I had confused my ex-husband's mental illness with his addiction.  I do believe that both he and his father owe me a full amends, based on the AA program they say they subscribe to.

I have believed in the past that the failure of both of them to do so reflected poorly on their "recovery".

I'm not entirely sure what I think about this quote, but it was interesting to me so I decided to post it in case it was helpful to someone else.

 As someone who went through Al-Anon, I did find these steps to be helpful to me on a personal level. But once again, if you flip this around and apply it to "co-dependents" instead of addicts, it provides further food for thought.

 "When co-dependents reach step Four of the Program, they’re instructed to make a “moral inventory”; in Step Nine, they are to make amends to those they’ve harmed. Obviously, it’s positive for any of us to soul-search, acknowledge faults and work to remedy them, and strive to repair damaged relationships. However, these actions aren’t requisites for a person to get and stay in recovery. A step that requires a form of atonement implies that co-dependency is a sin and injects morality into treatment."